Isn’t it interesting that no matter how much things change, things also still remain the same. What I’m talking about is that the basic human decencies taught to us by our mother or parent of significance, remain as true today as when they were first conceived.
My wonderful mother, age 86, now suffers from Alzheimer’s disease and underwent a bad fall. Per protocol she was rushed to the emergency room where my sister and I anxiously met her there to discover the extent of her injuries. It was explained to us that she would be in the hospital while they explored whether she would need one and possibly two surgeries and what was life-threatening.
My mother has been an RN nurse since 1956, but with her Alzheimer’s disease, does not remember the specifics of the nursing profession. Even though almost all of recent memory is sequentially erased in about 10 minutes or so, the one thing she never forgets is that her parents instilled in her the importance of being gracious and kind. So even though my mother could not remember caregivers at the hospital, she smiled graciously, spoke kind words and gave compliments to people as they came and went. It was soon obvious that she had no recollection or frame of reference for these complementary statements, yet they rolled off her tongue as sincerely as if she knew them for years. Subsequently, the staff found her to be absolutely charming and heartwarming even though they had never met her before. Mom was treated with an extra dose of kindness and compassion by them in compensation for her initial foray of kindness and thanksgiving. Both parties were uplifted.
What I am stating is that Alzheimer’s disease could not erase this deeply ingrained pattern of behavior from my grandparents instilled into my mother. This emphasis on being gracious showed itself at what is typically a persons poorest hour (we all know that doctors and nurses often make the worst patients). I’m not saying my mother was perfect, because we are all far from it, but for five days, she charmed and lifted the spirits of many a nurse, physical or occupational therapist, pharmacist, housekeeper or dietary staff member and others that she came in contact with. This made their day, brightened their spirits and gave them a happy countenance ironically from someone who had no idea what she was doing. Mom didn’t remember the fall or the ambulance ride for heaven sake! She certainly did not do it for secondary gain but it was simply built into her overall pattern of behavior. Are you so hardwired that you would default to be instinctively gracious even when your mind was “unplugged”? I can help you learn to be that way.
The lesson here is that we have a huge opportunity in our dealings with business associates, customers, suppliers and other people with which we routinely do business or have interactions of various kinds. If there is an underlying tone of graciousness, kindness and overall humanity, you absolutely will have an effect on others even if it is subconscious or subliminal. At Send Out Cards we call that “making the world a better place.” Read future blogs about our new “Card-a-Day” program or reach out to Dr. Harold at 816-808-2465 or e-mail me at ralph@guywithtwofirstnames.com.